Wednesday, May 28, 2014


WHY TEACHERS ARE &%^$#@

As the end of the school year draws to a close, I feel for the teachers who had to endure some things we never think of.  I have one daughter who is a teacher in high school, and I am sure she had heard some of these things through out the year!
These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)
 Q. Name the four seasons! 
 A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
 Q. How is dew formed?  
 A. The sun shines down on the leaves and make them perspire.
 Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?  
 A.. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.
 Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections?  
 A.. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election. 
Q. What are steroids?  
 A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs     
           (Shoot yourself now, there is little hope)  
Q. What happens to your body as you age?   
 A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
 Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?   
 A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery? 
            (So true)
 Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes!  
 A. Premature death 
 Q. What is artificial insemination?  
 A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow. 
 
 Q. How can you delay milk turning sour?
 A. Keep it in the cow.
        (Simple, but brilliant)

 Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)?  
 A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal
 cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and
 the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U.  
             
 Q. What is the fibula?  
 A. A small lie 

 Q. What does 'varicose' mean? 
 A. Nearby 
 Q. What is the most common form of birth control?  
 A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. 
           (that would work)
 Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Cesarean section'!  
 A. The Cesarean section is a district in Rome. 

 Q. What is a seizure?  
 A. A Roman Emperor.     
       (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit) 
 Q. What is a terminal illness? 
 A. When you are sick at the airport.

       (irrefutable) 
 Q. What does the word 'benign' mean? 
 A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight. 
        (brilliant)

Q. What is a turbine?   
A. Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head. Once a Arab Boy 
reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.
       (now we’re getting somewhere) 

5 comments:

  1. We are all in trouble if that is our future, lol. I showed these to Liam and he goes, "Are kids really that stupid?" yep..then I have to hold my tongue on that comment for obv. reasons, lol. Blessings

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  2. Oh my - Yes, I feel sorry for teachers too.

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  3. Oh. My. Goodness. How much trouble is our country in!?!? If the kids are that dumb, though, it's the teachers and parents fault. Anyway, no wonder we have Turd Boy in office. It all makes sense now ... ~:)

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  4. So very sad. And Florida just lowered the GPA needed for 8th graders to move on to high school. It will only get worse.

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  5. Wow! Those a funny, but then they're not. From 16 year old kids? Amazing. But scary. And they'll be voting in a couple years. Now that's scary.

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